The Nation Prepares...

... of the day...

CNN Headlines at this present time:



"Legendary band has 'unfinished music'"

"Harrison Ford's chest hair waxed, ripped off" (WITH VIDEO!)

"What will apple debut at Macworld swan song?"

"Obama reviewed cobbler on TV in '01"

"Artist tests Facebook 'nipple rule'"



This is the news.



Name of the day: Le-a.

Pronounciation: Le-DASH-A.

That dash ain't silent.

Divinity, served cold with onion and miracle whip

In searching for a nice, basic pasta recipe that I could make for this evening: something involving maybe some good parmesan cheese, broccoli, spinach, olive oil, garlic, maybe some asparagus or sundried tomatoes or something... I came across one of the reasons that, from a culinary perspective, sometimes America sucks.

I give you MAC RANCH!

1/2 bottle ranch dressing
1/2 container vegetable dip
1/3 cup purchased salad dressing
4 stalks celery, diced
4 hard boiled eggs, peeled
1 box spaghetti noodles, cooked
1/4 cup milk
5 scallions, chopped

Chill noodles and eggs. Chop eggs into noodles. Add mixture of onions and celery. Add ranch dressing and vegetable dip. Add salad dressing and milk then mix.

The author helpfully notes that her favorite salad dressing "is Miracle Whip."

I'd never thought of Miracle Whip as "salad dressing." I'd also never thought of mixing the above ingredients and calling them a meal.

I'm reminded of the casserole made for us last XMAS, with canned asparagus, hard-boiled eggs, canned peas, cream of mushroom soup, and crackers.

If you haven't seen it before, check out The Amazing Mackerel Pudding Plan. It's snappy and it makes me die a little inside every time I read it.

Paté

WTF?

Reduced for quick sale. "Herb." It's German. Apparently it also comes in "mushroom" and "garlic."


It's um... shiny.



And it smells like catfood.


Also, open faced radish sammiches are apparently "fast, fresh, and easy."